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Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
February, San Jose
I got my PHD thesis approved and partially funded. Haters who said I couldn’t do it, mainly Ollie in third grade who called me dumb, beat it! Actually, I just saw you’re volunteering in a food bank in San Fransisco, so you’re probably a nice guy now, but third grade Ollie. Beat it! Imma get my research done.
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Lou Torbjornsen
Funny! Lol!!!!! 😍 😍 😍😍😛😜😗😗😌😘😚😜
Bret Cantona
I know Ollie. He's at best ok. Hehe.You go get em. You've earned it and the research you're doing is fantastic!
Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
March, Nashville
I hope the following becomes a common misconception; macadamia got its name from a nutty professor in horticultural academia.
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Hank Haas
Nuts, nuts the squirrel said. Is that picture from Florence's Big Oven? I friggin love those croissants.
Ken Lorino
Anyone who pines, knows it's no peanut persuading the pistaschios of the world
Jennifer Jupiter
Yes, they're the almond kind. I'm eating an unhealthy amount of these for lunch lately. And I'm using a lose term for lately. It's been like five months were I've had Florence's croissants for lunch at least thrice a week. It's showing on both their and mine bottom line. Their macadamia is great, but almond is really where it's at.
Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
April, UiN
Milo’s been acting weird lately. I could swear to higher powers that he was talking on the phone and saying shit about how he’s from the future. Time Travelling Pussycats. Sounds like a guilty pleasure B-movie.
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Lou Torbjornsen
I'd watch that!
Jelena
@jenniferjupiter, I know we're besties, but if you're just posting this to get me to share my weird cat story to the world then you owe me a fancy ass rose. You know I claimed my cat was using my espresso machine last month. It's no joke.Also, he completely messed up my grind setting.
Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
May, San Jose
Whomever said ”Hit the Books, cause they don’t hit back” can do the same as Third Grade Ollie.
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Calvin Jones
I wish there was a coffee table book about boxing that had a jack in the box element with a fist that flew up and punched one who opened it. Just so that expression could be proven wrong.
Jenny Jones
I know a book who hit back. Lauren Book has a mean right hook.
Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
June, Nashville
I usually don’t post stuff like this, but I’m torn. My PHD is done, and I was hoping confetti would fall but now I’m just stuck between pushing the PHD or getting a J.O.B. A friend suggested I should try and bring the PHD research to our esteemed congresswoman and maybe beg for an environmental consultant position, but it seems pretty long shot. Any suggestions? Collective wisdom of procrastinators? What should I do?
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Lou Torbjornsen
Cuz, it's time to get a job. Nobody cares about the enviroment anymore. Kidding! Come on, get it in the hands of anyone who's willing to read it.
Bret Cantona
You know I think the research you did in my lab is groundbreaking and made me proud to be your professor.Just because everyone can't see that right now, you should keep pushing it and getting it in other peoples' hands.
Jennifer Jupiter
Thanks! You were always my favorite!
Jennifer Jupiter The Third of Madagascar
August, San Jose
Again, Milo’s creeping me out. I saw him run past with glasses on him. Anyone out there have cats who are acting weird.
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Kyle Cantona
SO weired, i could swear my cast spoke the other day too.
Bret Cantona
I could swear my cat spoke the other day.
He looked me dead in the eye and said "don't skimp on the wet food."
Tammy Torg
No way! For real? I've been saying cats have been acting weird for months now. What is going on?!
Clara
I thought I've been going nuts. Please tell me this is not some prank. I've caught my cat Colonol reading a book. Chatting baby language with my 9-month old and I kid you not, using my laptop. What is happening? We need to tell someone! I may also just be seriously sleep deprived.
Ken
Haha, funny joke guys. I'm not going for it. Cats can't talk. Maybe if it was dogs I'd believe you.
Calvin Jones
No joke Ken. I have three cats. They tied med to my kitchen chair yesteday and forced me to listen to a presententaion on the rise of environmental maladies and the increase in both ocean temperature and earthquakes caused by fracking. I'm terrified of cats now. And pretty concerned about the environment. They made compelling arguments.